apparently my world is coming full circle and eating itself. i can't deny the evidence yet i couldn't tell you how or even when it happened. another example of how our lives can get so far ahead of us. i wonder: do our lives know more than we do? do they have the same subjective point of view as we do or can they see beyond us to the bigger picture? i think they're as subjective as we are, because their omniprescence and omnipotence would mean just looking over the details of our lives, meaning looking over the details of themselves. but don't we do that every day? live life still completely unaware of ourselves? i don't want to be unaware of myself. you once told me that i was your favourite thing. first in a note,then verbally and, finally, in a song. you don't tell me i'm your favourite thing anymore, though. i'm starting to think it's because i'm not. once again, how or even why is beyond me. my feelings haven't changed. why have yours? do you even freaking know? or are you just going to be another puppet, completely unaware of themselves? i always thought you were better than that, dear, but i've been wrong before.
4 comments:
i think i'm okay...yet i can't see inside me, so i woulnd't know. my inerds could be rotting away, what a stink.
just so you know, you're my favorite thing.
<3 always K
Rambling is the sign of a healthy mind in my eyes. 'Maverick' *is* wonderful...man, I love words =)
You should definitely try and get to a Pride march whenever you can; there's a really fun atmosphere and a great community feel to them. Plus, it really made me feel...hah, proud, I guess =D
Your new posts are really interesting. I loved the bit in "Michael Stipe" when you talk about fruit currency. It amused me no end and makes me think you must have a good imagination and a great sense of humour. That's a damn good combination, lady.
hi mama. I don't think I'm gonna make a blog, what would I blog about? I already have my eljay and my paper journal and all that kind of thing.
my personality test told me I find patterns in life compulsively. I thought that was interesting and very much true.
I don't understand life, you know. and not understanding yourself doesn't mean you're not aware of yourself or that you don't want to be. it just means, well, it means whatever it is it means. I don't claim to know everything, or anything for that matter. (sup, ambiguous comment?) I don't know anything really. as previously stated. I know that things change and I don't know why but they do and I'm not trying to have that mean anything more than it means. but. life is different than it was, I just know that.
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